We all know how it is. There’s an upcoming exam that you didn’t have time to prepare for, or you just need a free day from school so badly that you could scream. In such situations, it’s a good thing to know how to fake being sick. This should however be practiced with moderation because the more you fake it, the bigger the chances are that someone will be able to tell that it’s not real. To know how to fake being sick means to know how and why it happens. Here are a few useful tips on how to fake being sick along with symptoms for each type of illness.
Fake Faint
Symptoms of Fainting
Fainting most often happens when your blood pressure drops for a few moments and there’s not enough blood that gets to your brain. Before fainting, some people feel sudden extreme fatigue, dizziness, confusion and will sweat while feeling cold at the same time.
Tips on Faking It
Try to prepare by avoiding eating and drinking that day. This will reduce your blood pressure and will make it look more genuine if someone checks. Also complain that you don’t feel well and you’re very hungry. When you drop, be careful not to hit your head but do your best to seem unconscious by falling straight and to the front. It’s very easy for people to tell that it’s not real if you seem to try to protect yourself when falling. You can decide to faint in a crowded room. This will give you a good reason, such as being hot or not having enough air. Usually once a person is lying down, the blood circulation is restored, so only remain “unconscious” for about 30 seconds. Act confused and speak softly when you wake up.
Fake a Headache
Symptoms of a Headache
Faking a headache is the best answer to the question of how to fake being sick. We all have felt the pain of a real headache, so we know that headaches make us sensitive to light, sleepy and sometimes queasy.
Tips on Faking It
It helps if you’re actually sleepy, so try to wake up very early in the morning. Try to keep your eyelids a little lowered as if they’re swollen, which is common in headaches. Grab your head and massage different parts of it very often, as you would do if it actually hurts. What hurts during a headache are the cranial nerves. They are placed at the interior corner of the eyebrows, above your ears and at the back of the head. Massage some of those areas. Sometimes the really powerful headaches are felt on half of the head, either the left of the right side. Massage intently the places that you decided are hurting. Sometimes strong headaches come with nausea. You can complain that you feel queasy and even disappear to the toilet to say that you threw up. As with every other fake illness, move slowly and try to think that you’re actually sick.
Fake Nausea
Symptoms of Nausea
Nausea is another perfect choice because the chances are that you already know how it feels. Nausea is often caused by eating something that doesn’t agree with you and there are no symptoms except being pale, feeling dizzy and nauseous. It almost always ends up with vomiting.
Tips on Faking It
Make up or sunscreen can make you look pale, while sweating can be achieved by doing an intense activity for a few minutes, for example sit-ups. Hopefully you will not have to go all the way through, but be prepared to vomit if you really have to. Sometimes even being too hungry can make you feel like you’re going to vomit, because the acid in your stomach irritates it in the absence of food. One thing that you can try is to fake vomit spasms and run to the toilet while covering your mouth. You can also say that earlier on you went to the toilet for “number two”, and it was watery. You should say that it only happened once, otherwise you may have to prove that you have diarrhea and that’s more complicated.
Fake a Fever
Symptoms of a Fever
Faking a fever is one of the more difficult answers to how to fake being sick. The symptoms are shivers, sweat, muscles aches, weakness and loss of appetite, sometimes even a headache. The most difficult to fake is the high temperature of the body, which can be easily felt by your parents or teachers.
Tips on Faking It
You can complain about all the other symptoms, but it’s important to have a high temperature that others can feel. You can try to prepare a large, very warm cup of tea and drink it. This will help with the sweat as well. If you can’t prepare tea because of the risk of getting caught, the best solution is to do some effort. You can run or jump around the house. If that’s not possible either, then try to lift weights or sit for a while in a position that’s very difficult to maintain, until you feel you start to sweat and you’re warm. You can also try to contract your muscles in short but powerful moves. Complain that you don’t feel well as soon as you got heated enough.
Fake Dehydration
Symptoms of Dehydration
The symptoms of dehydration are thirst, a dry mouth, weakness, dizziness, not being able to sweat, decreased urination, extreme tiredness, very dry skin, constipation, headache and sometimes fever. Unfortunately you won’t be able to fake it in front of a doctor, while your parents may not be able to tell that you’re dehydrated. Dehydration alone should only be used as a last resort, but it goes very well along with other illnesses, like diarrhea or insolation.
Tips on Faking It
Dehydration often happens during the summer, when it’s very hot. It can start after you stayed for too long in the sun. To fake it, first of all don’t drink water, because it will make you need the toilet. Complain about thirst, weakness and not being able to stand up straight, just like before fainting. Complain that your entire head hurts, as opposed to a localized pain. Act as if you are irritable, but don’t overdo it as you risk upsetting your parents.
View All Comments /Add Comment